This past Thursday was a big day for our family. We met Ri's birthmom, and Ri was reunited with her for the first time in 3 months. I think that we were all a little nervous about it, but overall, we were thankful to meet her.
We met half-way at a park so that we could let the kids play and run around while we talked some. It was an emotional morning for Ri's birthmom. She misses Ri so much. I think it was hard for her to see that Ri has "grown up" some even in the past few months. I know it was hard for her to hear Ri call me "Mama". Sometimes when people hear our story, they say, "I can't believe that anyone would give away their 3 year old child." Details are confidential, but you will just have to trust me when I say that she would much rather be parenting Ri herself, and that this decision to let us adopt Ri was absolutely selfless on her part and was made because she believes that Ri could have a better life.
When we first arrived, we let Ri and D (this is what I will call her birthmom, for confidentiality) play for a while. D brought her a few fun new toys, plus some of her old stuff. She was most excited to see her "Runny Babbit" (I have laughed and laughed everytime she says it like that!) and she has kept it in her arms for much of the weekend. After they played for a bit, Ri joined Cate and Will on the playground while we sat with D and shared with her about how Ri is doing. We talked about her typical daily schedule, so that D would have a sense of what her day-to-day life is like now. We told her about Ri's great appetite, her love for anything outdoors, and her awesome athletic abilities. She shared a letter with us where she had written things that she wanted to make sure that we knew about Rihanna, everything from how much Ri likes strawberries to how much D loves Ri and misses her. Like I said, it was emotional.
We brought D a gift. It is a journal (yes, everyone who knows me knows that I have an insane love for journals). It is called "All about Myself" and has 200 pages of guided autobiography, asking questions like, "Who were my heroes when I was a child?" and "What was my favorite Christmas tradition?" I told D that I would love for her to write in the journal and then give it back to us so that we can share it with Ri someday. I assured D that we want Ri to know her and admire her the way that we do.
We will see her again in a few months...she asked if she could see Ri a couple of times for the first 2 years that she is with us. Our adoption agency is so helpful with this; they serve as "mediators" for us by setting up and being at these meetings. (One of our case-workers comes to the meetings, as well as D's case-worker.)
I told her right before we said good-bye, "Now I know why Ri is so gorgeous...because YOU are just beautiful." I hope that the Lord will give us the opportunity to "love on" D and to somehow be a part of her healing. Pray for D, if you think about her.