This post is especially dedicated to my fellow mommy friends who are watching their high-schoolers leave for college soon.
It is mid-June. Right now, Cate, my rising college sophomore, is at Camp All-American, investing her summer time into middle school girls. Rihanna, my rising college freshman, is working a morning shift at the Maple Street Biscuit Cafe, and will no doubt head back out later to her late evening shift at the Fat Shack. Will, my six foot-24inch high school senior, is standing by to save lives at the aforementioned Camp All-American, while also scoring an amazing tan. (My gorgeous, blue-eyed life guard.) Alana, the "baby" (?!) of the family, is still asleep midday, but soon will wake up and head to varsity cheer practice. Babe is his basement office, project managing the heck out of Sophos Internet Security. And I am here on the couch with my only companion, Tessa Joy the chihuahua. And people, I am experiencing a very foreign feeling...boredom. I don't think that I have been bored since 2006, the year before I birthed Cate. Do y'all remember boredom? It is weird. But kind of nice. I digress.
This boredom has me thinking about the Burwell nest. It certainly isn't empty, but it IS emptying. This nest has been messy, loud, at times chaotic, but happy and blessed for 19 years, and the fact that it is quieting down makes me want to CRY. (Thankfully, my super-duper meds will prevent that!). There is this part of me that is so very proud of my big three out working and serving others. They drove their cars to work after packing their lunches (and dressing themselves!), and they just don't need me like they used to. But isn't that what I wanted?! Ah yes, women are so complicated. I am happy, sad, and proud, all at once. Any other Mama Birds out there, sadly and joyfully watching their kiddos start to fly away? (Should we meet for group therapy? Goodness knows, I am free.) Emptying nests, like every stage of parenting, are not for the faint of heart.
"They" told me this would happen. "They" said, "Enjoy these days of a busy, messy house filled with kids, because you will miss it someday." And I was like, "Um...hmmm...no I won't." And, crap. "They" were right.
As always, my theology informs this new chapter of my life. I remind myself that God sees our nest. He loves us all dearly. He is sovereignly working his good plans in each of us Burwells. And when the nest is finally empty, He will show Mama Bird what to do next.
If I am not dead, then I am not done, to put it bluntly.
And you aren't done either. Lord, please show all of us what paths you want us to walk in. Please comfort those who are like me, watching their babies pack for college in a few months. Come sit with us--in our nests--and show us what you want for us.